Sunday, May 15, 2011

I Promise to Stay at Room Temperature

If you've ever had a child with special needs, you will appreciate this. There are moment in which you want to give up entirely, moments when you can't take anymore, moments when your patience is sorely tried, and moments when you want to go back to bed and hide under the covers.

And then there are moments which make up for all of the other moments. Moments that make it all worth it. Moments that cause you to wonder why you ever questioned God. Moments that make you feel unworthy as a mother. Moments that cause you to cry for all the right reasons.

Yesterday my son wrote me a letter. It was entitled, "My Promise Scroll." Now you have to understand that this came on the heels of one of the roughest parenting weeks ever. Ben got his first detention at school. Lies were flying. Homework was missing. Parents were crying. Despair was encroaching.

Here are the contents of Ben's letter:
1. I promise not to disobey.
2. I promise to be honest.
3. I promise not to lie.
4. I promise to be loyal.
5. I promise to forgive.
6. I promise to love you forever.
7. I promise to be at room temperature.
8. I promise to be kind.
9. I promise to make the right choice.
10. I promise to be there when things are right.
11. I promise to be there when things are wrong.
12. I promise to be in the family that is forever.
13. I promise to be an Erickson.
14. I promise to be (and here he inserted his full name), who I am!!!
Love, Ben
I promise, too, Ben. I love you soooo much! And if I fail, at least I can stay at room temperature. That's one thing I can promise you for sure. (Oh, Jesus, help me to be what Ben needs me to be. Give me grace for each day and help me to see Him through Your eyes.)


Dianne said...

Absolutely precious. And I know just what you mean about these amazing moments of grace on the heels of weeks of heartache. I especially loved "I promise to be there when things are right...I promise to be there when things are wrong." If that's not unconditional love, I don't know what is. Praise God He never leaves us or forsakes us whether things are right or wrong.

Elisabeth said...

This is beautiful. I'm falling in love with Ben:0) I'm praying for your mommy-ing every single day. Don't you forget that, just because I may be psycho-babbling about other junk with you & forgetting to mention it. I have an alarm set on my phone every day to stop and pray for you, whether I remembered to yet or not. Just so you know.